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HAPPY WIFE, HAPPY LIFE: A Sunday Sermon #HoleyMatters

I’m having a very hard time getting a Domestic Help for the house. Juggling our jobs, while taking care of the baby and house chores is quite stressful. I am glad I’m in good company, as I found out that many Men out here are also looking for a Domestic worker, they just prefer marrying one.

Seriously dude?

I have serious concerns about this generation. We are the most technologically and academically advanced generation, to date, in  the history of our nation but our Social nous is straight out of the dark ages. Our conscience is in a proverbial sate of Jekyll and Hyde. Capable of tremendous innovation but plagued by an antiquated sense of morality.

It’s quite the puzzle don’t you think? Allow me to explain to you why such a forward thinking generation can be shamefully backward. It  is because we pick and choose what to advance and what to store in the attic along with Cow hides and Magic potions

You see, Kenyans love status. They love anything that gives them an edge over the next person. When someone goes to school and masters their field of study, they are held in high esteem. That’s why we refer to each other in professional terms. Daktari, Wakili, Engineer, Boss. It sets you apart from the rest of the herd, makes you feel special. The same goes for our various cultures. Can you imagine if everyone was made equal in our traditions? No man would ever thump his chest by virtue of what dangles between his legs. There would be nothing to give Men an edge over Women. That is why no matter what postmodern era we are in, people will always gauge a Woman’s inherent value by her ability to carry out domestic tasks. Tasks which, going by our own cultures, are beneath Men.

I remember reading somewhere, that Men  were taught many things, except how to deal with empowered Women. To an extent, this is true, how many times have our Aunties/Uncles asked our Ladies to tone down their overt shows of financial independence all in the name of “Nani atakuoa ukifanya hivo”. Lets not forget the famous Christmas Carol “Bado hujatuletea mtu?”Followed closely by the smash hit “Utaosha aje sufuria za mtu wako ukieka hizo kucha?”

Understand though, the aim of all this demarcation of labour with domestic work being the sole jurisdiction of women, is to safeguard the fragile Male Ego. In relationships, women who give in to this social order do so to avoid heartbreak. You see, there is always a stronger, more handsome, richer Man eyeing your Woman and if you can dull her beauty and power by reducing her to your mboch, then the competition won’t see her. 

“A Man who marries a beautiful Woman, is like the farmer who plants maize by the roadside”

Most Men see it as a matter of inevitability that she will be stolen or taken by a much more deserving Man! The Male ego is a trip!

Ukweli tu usemwe, wa kukuacha,atakuacha. Akue kwa shamba ama Business Class ya British Airways na hakuna kitu utafanya mjamaa.

Taking the above into consideration, don’t you think it’s incumbent upon you fellas, to make sure your Woman is firing on all cylinders? Don’t you want to the world to see that you bagged a sexy as hell bombshell? I love when a Woman is the best version of herself, when she is following her dreams, when she looks and feels her best, when she is truly happy. Men crave the loving of a good Woman, not realizing that what makes her good is meeting her full potential. 

As Men, we need to ditch this archaic bullshit and cultivate relationships based on Honesty, Respect, Understanding and Love because those are the qualities that will outlast any traditional notion you might have.

Now, harusi tunayo!??

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