Sexercise 101: Kegels and Butterflies

Your time to become a sex goddess that leaves your man a quivering mass of spent fantasies and lifeless organs, is here! Kegels you’ve probably heard and are tired of hearing of. Magazines and doctors have been extolling the virtues of this vaginal wall exercise for decades but still the men talk about ‘basin pussy’. Is it that we don’t listen? Or are we too lazy? Do we forget to keep doing the squeeze and release? Have kegels become a tired cliche? All these perhaps? Kegels are not optional girls, they are compulsory! As compulsory as wiping after a number 2! They help you reach orgasm much easier while giving you more erotic control over your man, win-win. Kegels tone you pubococcygeus muscles (PC’s for short, like pussy, only it’s science), which is a set of three that run from the back the the front of the pubic bone to the front, encircling the opening to the vagina and the anus (hey! kegels are a two for one!).  A good way to know which muscles to use is to try and stop the stream midway through peeing. The muscles you use to do this are the same ones you need to contract and relax as you do your kegel exercises. How do you do them? The Kegel Routine 1. Locate your pc’s by stopping and starting the flow of urine. 2. The short kegel squeeze: contract the PCs 20 times, one squeeze per second, breathing out gently as you tighten. Don’t push down when you release; simply let go. Do two sets every day. Gradually build up to two sets of 75 a day. Then add: 3. The long Kegel squeeze: contract your pcs and count to 3. Do about 20 sets of this relaxing between contractions, building up to 75 sets a day. When you get to expert level don’t stagnate, keep increasing the time of contraction, working up to holding for 10 seconds and relaxing for 10 seconds. After this add: 4. The Kegel push-out:  After releasing the contraction, gently push down and out with your pc muscles (don’t force the push). Don’t neglect any as you learn to do the rest. Instead, create a kegel sequence that combines long and short kegels with push-outs — for example, 10 short squeezes, 10 long squeezes, and five push-outs (any sequence will do, whatever makes you comfy) The Butterfly Quiver:                                                                                                                                                Two months of the kegel routine and your strong pc muscles will be able to grasp his penis, contracting and relaxing around it in a sex move called ‘the butterfly quiver’. You must talk about it before you start, to avoid any confusion and impatience. Get him nice and hard, then go on top. Sit on him and start your sex goddess routine. Without any of you moving any other parts of your bodies, tighten your pussy around his turgid staff then release, tighten, release… Keep doing this until your contractions and releases are pushing him in and out of your honey pot. Both of you must be patient and build up to orgasm slowly. You can rub your clit on his groin as you keep the contractions going around his member. If your pc muscles are strong enough he should feel like your sucking the cum out of him when he ejaculates. Like you’ve given him head with your pussy! Do this and watch to see if your new argument in your home won’t be that he has no life out of your bedroom. If you don’t believe me let yourself go, have a flabby pussy, and when your sisters and friends come to bitch and drink your wine while abusing your resident cheating asshole you will have this niggling thought at the back of your mind, “Maybe if I’d have done my kegels religiously…” The government and I can only do so much, we can’t force you to try and keep your man.