Secrets

Sexercise 101: Squats

We talked about the importance of introducing kegels to help strengthen your pussy’s pc muscles, strengthening your pelvic floor to avoid the totally unsexy flabby puss, and all at once, make you Aphrodite incarnate, trapping your man into a permanently lustful, bewitched state. There’s more. I wish that that simple or that it was enough. You girls should know better though, when were things ever that simple? Huh? Mwanamke ni complications, is how it should really go. In my research I came across multiple articles about how unhealthy it is to do kegels, as an exercise, in isolation of any other lower body work outs. The continuous contractions of the pc’s can and will cause a weak pelvic floor if you don’t strengthen your other pelvic region muscle groups i.e. your gluteal muscles, for balance. In layman’s terms, if you don’t develop your butt muscles, your pussy will still end up weak and unable to grasp your man’s cock to maximum satisfaction. We do NOT want that! Squats, when heavy and methodical, also work your Kegels. As you squat, you are (primarily) working your glutes (work out lingo for buttocks); they are contracting and driving the load of your body (plus weight you add) upward. As you stand from your squat, your glutes are tight, and you’re keeping your Kegel’s tight and engaged. Women who have more muscle mass, particularly in the glutes (I’m gym savvy now, can you tell?), have greater control of the Kegel muscles; you learn to control muscle contraction, lending to greater sexual satisfaction for both you and your partner. Well, it wasn’t technically a lie when I said you wouldn’t have to go to the gym for this. Yes, squats are part of the exercise regimen at a proper gym but no, you don’t have to go there to do them. This is Africa so you’ve probably had to squat to pee/poop at some point in your life. Pit latrines, Asian style loos, bushes…Squatting is a way of life around here. If you’ve got children then you’ve probably had to squat to get down to their level. In short, we are no strangers to squatting. How many times a day should you do squats? Well, you should do at least 15 a day breaking them down into 5 sets of 3 at the beginning. It is recommended that you carry a weight to increase the load your butt has to carry (unless you’re Vera Sidika that is, her load is already bigger than any one person should have to handle). The bigger the weight, the better the work out, the stronger your glutes and pc’s and the better the sex. Imagine a scenario where you’ve perfected the “butterfly quiver” and squatting! Then you pull the move below on that lucky sumbitch while ‘quivering’ your butterfly…
he will die!

he will die!

At the end of it all you can even break his flat screen at the height of EPL fever with no fear, because that nigga ain’t going nowhere.