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Minx, Twitter Story
https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531462995499843584 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531463468302745600 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531464214012235776 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531464603679866882 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531464938968334336 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531465381362540545 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531465711118712832 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531466185062490112 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531466514403442688 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531467366782476288 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531467737827409920 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531468140941950976 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531468471834787840 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531468773275226112 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531472292845727744 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531472652184338433 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531473094947651585 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531473387693301760 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531473834202128384 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531474401469165568 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531474822015225856 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531475292263809025 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531475604940808192 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531476152259727360 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531476617424818176 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531476953237569537 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531477314434248704 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531477644035235841 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531477810746232833 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531478581927747585 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531479385363464193 https://twitter.com/Swaggattraktion/status/531479975946616833 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531480222986932224 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531480545289859072 https://twitter.com/Swaggattraktion/status/531480649925132288 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531481382254809088 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531481732399505408 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531482161543925762 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531482623399698432 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531483149940060160 https://twitter.com/SiriZetu/status/531483559778082816
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FacialKnight, Nymphomaniacs
As the most qualified member of the male species to offer them representation (quit giving me the side-eye lads) I’m here to re-negotiate our contract ladies. It has come to my astute attention that some of my brothers have been subject to the most gross of human sexual abuse. The kind that hasn’t been witnessed ever. Yes, even since we realized dicks and pussies were bff’s. Ladies, I thought we had called a truce. Did we not agree to live in peace, strip each others clothes off and boink like bunnies as a sign of prosperous times? I even signed the peace treaty, look on the dotted line, the semen isn’t even dry yet. Granted some of my brothers have been acting like neanderthals, but the punishment must fit the crime. But no, you had to go ahead and unleash on us the plague, best known as Nymphomania. It sounds like a dream come true, doesn’t it gentlemen! A girl who is always horny, all the time! The fire brigade couldn’t put out the fire in her pussy if they tried. Always ready for another round, always wants your dick in her mouth, and her pussy on your mustache! Need some vaseline guys? She is the complete opposite of the normal lass who has to be coaxed with sweet nothings and lots of money, into sex. Acting like we super-glued that vagina between her thighs purposefully to spite her. Always has a headache. If your chick has a regular headache, get that girl a CAT scan or get the f*** out, she don’t want none from you! Or bonyeza ushinde a lifetime supply of painkillers. When in Rome, do as the Romans do, and according to Spartacus, the Romans loved to fuck. The nympho was sent to earth to serve the interests of a male species whose brains gorge on sex and the female form. Or, were we sent to serve her? A friend of mine started dating this girl who was sexy as fuck! Her eyes just oozed “come fuck me” and her ass was so round, I swear it had a horizon. She made us drool! Lucky bastard. After a few weeks of hitting it, we started to notice he was always sleepy when we hung out. Eyes half closed, struggling to stay awake. At first we urged him to stop putting in so many hours in the office, all work and no play you know.Then one day he just spilled the beans. That she was fucking him too much. Like the old RnB songs, she actually made love all night. Was she was going for a world record? She wanted to fuck at noon, at 6 p.m, then at night – fuck from 10 p.m till morning. Then repeat! Everyday. Fucking, fucking, fucking. I got exhausted just listening to him. Some of the other guys looked like they’d just had sex on his behalf. You know it’s bad when your friends have that post orgasm yawning after your sex tale. We all looked at him with the pity befitting an Arsenal fan after a game with Chelsea. At some point he came close to asking her, “Wewe nani amekutuma! Rudi umwambie siko!” We saw his obvious distress and advised him that this was a three man job. That he should search for two of her exes and if he could only find one that would have her back, then he’d just have to dump her. Yes, I realize our clique isn’t exactly the Einstein Brain Trust, but what else were we to tell him? I personally thought he should man up and die an honourable death, inside a vagina. And be buried there too, save us the funeral costs. No one’s going to truly mourn any man that dies in pussy anyway. Lucky sod! Ladies, whoever in your camp came up with the nympho idea, needs a raise, a lifetime of gratuitous oral sex and a star on the Hollywood walk of fame. Apart from it being an act of terrorism, it’s a stroke (hehehe, stroke) of genius! If a man spends most of his time having sex and working, when will he have time to chase other skirts, or drink himself into a stupor with his boys? A man’s mind is surprisingly single tracked. Either we are getting money, or getting fucked. When we take a break from getting money, we want to enjoy it by using it to get us laid. That’s where the dating and prowling for girls in bars falls in. However, if there was to be an abundant source of good sex, anything else would struggle to get a time slot. So that idiotic 90 day rule is best used to wipe the mud off your heels ladies. To all prudes, prim and proper girls who have “class” and also not forgetting the migraine enthusiasts, please, open your legs and your mouths so that you tire this man into submission. Do you think you have the time to go through a pond of frogs to get prince charming? Turn the peasant into royalty. Fuck him to an early grave, give him a warrior’s death.
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I have been told that I fap too much by concerned friends. No, they didn’t do it intervention-style, but they would have if they knew each other no doubt. Aye, alcoholics out there, the best way to avoid an intervention is if your friends and family never meet each other. Hii mambo ya introductions muachie the sane, drug free, non addiction prone members of our society. So, back to my nether activities. Well, for those who haven’t been paying attention, I only learned the joys of diddling my nubbin in a few months ago. Don’t get me wrong, I already knew what an orgasm was, and not just from the Mills And Boon stories of my youth. No, a flesh and very hot red blooded male from my past decided to ruin sex with lesser mortals for me about two years ago. His extensive foreplay, lots of vodka and not so substantial equipment, made me see stars. I had the universe behind my eyelids for what felt like a fleeting second but he says I was down for almost a minute, shaking and making sounds he describes as a cross between that laughter that comes from deep within the stomach, and the crying of paid Luo mourners. I couldn’t even be embarrassed. I’d just experienced heaven and I was obsessed with recreating that sensation. Years later, I have given up on the male species. None can recreate that feeling but he who induced it that first time… Yes, I did it with that guy again and no, he didn’t make me cum. With that evidence in hand, I concluded that Eros possessed him that day. The charm, the care, the absolute romanticism of that day, no, it could not be the work of a human. Only a god can make you see heaven. Logic people! Logic! So, until Eros possessed some man out there and ravages me once more, heaven was barred to me. I became celibate. This year, Aphrodite, my Minx’s personal god, felt it good that I learn to pleasure myself. And so it became. My clit for some reason gained about a billion nerve endings and man was I grateful!!! One random day reading through Literotica and feeling myself up without expectation I experienced an intense heat in the pit of my stomach that made me moan like an animal! I was shocked! I wanted more. So I did it again, that light touch across my extremely engorged clit that made colours spin and my legs tremble. A few more and my world shattered. It was magic! Well, months later and I now know that there’s a few types of orgasms out there. There’s the little ones where your pussy tingles and the sensation travels as far as your knees. There’s the medium ones that cause you to tremble all over a little bit and last for about 10 seconds (yes, I have the discipline to time them, for science, for you!) And there the huge ones! These are the kind that make your legs weak and if you’re unfortunate enough to experience them while standing, well, you’ll be very acquainted with the floor when you’re done writhing around in absolute wanton pleasure. One big one actually made me cry…a little. It was one tear! I had a mini black out and when I came to my cheek was wet. It was surprising but that’s one of the best I’ve ever had. I’ve squirted FYI, it was once, at the beginning of my experimentation, and I had done an insane amount of research over the internet on how to make myself do it. 90% of the blogs were written by men: How To Make Yourself Squirt by Some Man. smh. I’d totally get it if the guy was telling other men how to make their woman squirt but noooo, he’s of the balls decides to educate women on their bodies. It’s like a woman writing: Scrotun Care; A Complete Guide On How To Scratching Your Balls. Absolute nonsense! One lady wrote an awesome guide on squirting and as soon as I duplicate my first result I’ll definitely give you the lowdown on that. My fapping adventures continue though. I can’t stop now! I’m basically a teenage boy right now. My 15 year old ‘penis’ won’t let me stop touching it. Besides, Aphrodite and Minx have given me the gift of orgasm, it may not be heaven but it would be rude to throw it back in their faces and stop fapping. So, I’ll keep diddling my kambosho thank you very much! Feel free to call me an addict. All I am is a girl in love with her pussy.
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afrisex3 Let me taste you, just a little. But you are tasting me. I like it so very much I want more. You can’t have it all at once. You’ll dieย  of awesomeness poisoning, and we can’t have that. Ha ha ha! Ok. I’ll bite ๐Ÿ˜€ No, I’ll nibble. Nibble away, baby. Slowly….. Slowly. Put it here. *Puts it there.* A lick and it’ll go even slower. A lick where? Wherever you want it. Behind my ear. I’ll lick it then blow gently into the wet spot. Your turn. Where do you want this tongue to play? On my lips. Touch them with just the tip. Just the tip of… what? Your tongue. Alright, let’s start with that. So, I run my tongue gently along your lips. What do they taste like… Honey and pepper. Then you… I part them slightly and the tip on my tongue tastes yours a little before I shut my lips again. You taste of nuts and cream. I pull you closer, close enough to fell your heart thumping through your chest. I inhale you, then I bite your lower lip… I sigh out loud and you take advantage of my parted lips and kiss me deeply. I wrap my arms around your torso and push myself up, into you. I grab your arse, hard, and kiss you full-on your moist supple lips. I can feel you hardening against my front. I bite your lower lip and widen my legs a little… Soft flower, ready flower, I can feel her pulsating moisteness. She is ready. I can barely remember our clothes coming off… She is ready, that heady musk hits my brain like a train. *LONG INTERMISSION* Sorry, phonecall. Oh timber. I call timber. Warm, strong, poised. Iron. Ready for me. Heated. Rhythmic. Pulsating in time with my fleshy folds.   afr ero   Heaven, this is what it is. Hell, these thirsts seem unquenchable. Are you the one to sate me, free me in your chains? Can you find satisfaction with one intent on increasing the depth of your longing? Can you be sated? Because I never want you to feel sated so long as you’re intent on invoking this deep, heated… Can satisfaction come from an increase in hunger? Isn’t that we’re here? To figure that out? What if we never do? What if… What if… What if… What if we do? What if we do and it’s all boring from then henceforth? We love or we learn. Forever doesn’t have to happen but we can search for it. Even a slice of it is more than many people will ever experience. As I said, perfect :-* :-* :-* Perfect is flawed. Beautifully. Painfully. Give me the beauty, give me your flaws, give me all your ugly and your insane. All the rage and your pain. I can find light all on my own. It’s your darkness that I want. You’ll have it. I used to run away from myself and it’s tiring. This is me. Warts and desires and dreams and fears. Thank you, for sharing myself with you. Ha ha, I should thank you. I can be naked with you. And you have been naked with me. I think there’s space enough for both of us to be thankful. afrhm What are you afraid of? You’ve been so busy thinking of all sorts of kinky things to do with me you’ve forgotten ๐Ÿ˜‰ Ha ha ha, no. You’re afraid of disappointing your parents. What else? I’m scared of not doing anything with my life, of being a loser, of failing to live up to my potential. What are you afraid of? I’m afraid of being forgotten. Of never accomplishing anything life changing, not for me but for others. I want to be remembered a thousand years from now. I’m afraid of death, of loss in general. I’m a hoarder of souls. I don’t like to let go. These last two, I can relate to. I hate losing friends. I can’t imagine that all that emotion expended was for nothing. I know! Have you ever been at a point in your life where things just seem so undecipherable and nothing seems to be working? And then one thing or one relationship males sense and works? Then you find yourself grasping at it and the harder you grasp, the more it slips? Yeah, in my last relationship. That’s what it was like at the end. School and life in general. Nothing makes sense any more and trying to unravel it all….. When everything’s going wrong and you’re clinging to just that one relationship, it’s probably the reason everything is wrong in the first place. I agree. But what if there’s nothing to grasp? Like you’re floating in a vacuum? You let yourself float then the universe gets a chance to decant you from the mess of a life that’s not meant for you. Haven’t we floated long enough? Yes, but this fluid we’re in isn’t as viscous as the last. I’m finding it easier to navigate, to ground myself. I’ve never felt more lost. You’re a stranger and I’m baring it all to you. You can only find something after you’ve lost it. Maybe it’s because you’ve been waiting for me, you don’t sound like a stranger at all. It does feel strange, to some degree, after a lifetime of wearing masks. ….And that’s one hell of a pick-up line. Smooth ๐Ÿ˜‰ Is it scary? Thank you ๐Ÿ˜‰ Not any more. What does one really have to lose, being completely honest and open? The best interactions are based on this, so it’s a great place to start. I wish I could see your face as you say these things. Just to witness the intensity of all these revelations. Very few people can stand this intensity. Are you sure you’re ready? I’m not just ready, I’ll match you heat for heat, emotion for emotion, promise for promise. Let’s dance, let’s dalliance too. I like that. No. I love it. Give me more. Slowly, mami, slowly… I’m impatient for you ๐Ÿ™ Show me, how do you look today? Scruffy, like the writer stereotype :-/ I have a thing for writers. They have a thing for you too ๐Ÿ˜‰ There’s only one I’m interested in ๐Ÿ˜‰ *blush* Evening walk. Catch you in a bit. Keep your panties on. I didn’t wear any ๐Ÿ˜‰ images-2
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Transcription Eh! Ona diugaga kuoguo keino reke gwire. Nie mudu rume ucio wakwa diue kuria arutire experience. Nwona kang’ura, anyogaga ginya gamwira ambe areke thugume. Akajira, “Thuguma.” Ngai! Niuruo nie ginya akijikaga gaita. Niwona nudu urio arume maitaga ukaigwa niwaita, niarelax? Nitakimake arajikaga gaita. Noo ucio niwe mudurume arajikire diraita. Izi zingine dirathishagwo oo thishwo. Yes, nidorokaga gaigwa direda guthishwo. No, tanya mudurume ucio niwe aratumire jiite! Niwona uno arume maito kagwo, akahana taa akuo? Mii namwaganga, Ngai! noo ucio mudurume niwe oratumire. Ni ma ghai! Suzie nakwambia, huyo mwanaume alikuwaananitomba! Sema kutombwa! Dirakwira arafu, twatwa niguthishana, todo niarakimenya ka nie muti nidiwedete, hapo dii wet, nake ee wet, uria uriragia tumae… akaba akauhututhia mahaha kang’ura iguru, akauthigithia kang’ura-ini! Gaaaai! Nie daiguaga taa gumia! Ginya muiritu ucio neiba twareganatie neiba wakwa ee, aki— ajire “Maa Shiro! Nie ma! Uria uratumire — jike. Uratumire ginya uratuma jite mudurume wakwa, naniturahitanitie, diramualika, oke nyuba, niguo tuthishane, kotodo murashinare diraga toro!” Ghai! Ucio mudurume arathicaga, taiga guthicana. Ghai! We tiga urauga uhoro wa kuogwo, nie aranyogaga gaita! Niwaugaga guita! Wewe! Ha! Ginya naniwatuma jokie, Gai Mwathani! Ria igiruta muti ku? Translation to: Kiswahili/Sheng’: Eh! Kunyonywa pussy! Wacha nikuambie! Huyo mwanaume wangu, sijui alitoa wapi experience. Unaona clit? Alikuwa ananinyinya hadi namwambia aniwache nikojoe. Ghai! Alikuwa ananifanya hadi namwaga. Unaina vile mwanaume humwaga hadi unaona amaerelax? Mimi alikuwa ananifanya hadi namwaga. Hizo zingine ilikuwa tu kufanywa. Yees, nilikuwa nakua horny na naskia nataka kufanywa tu na huyo mwanume aliyenifanya nimwage. Unaona vile wanaume hucum anakaa kama amakufa? Mimi namwaganga na huyo mwanaume ndio hunifanya hivyo. Suzie nakwambia, huyo mwanaume alikuwa ananitomba! Sema kutombwa! Tukiamua nikufuck, juu anajua mimi napenda mti, sasa unaona yeye ako wet na mimi niko wet, vile inalilisha tumaji…kwanza anasongesha juu kwa clit, alafu anairub kwa clit! Ghaaai!!! Mimi huskia ni kama nitakunya! Hadi jirani ananiita kuniambia, “Aki Shiro! Wewe! Vile ulinifanya nifanye! Ulifanya niite mwanaume wangu na tulikuwa tumekosana, nikamwalika kwa nyumba ndio tufuck! Kwa sababu mlifuck nikashindwa kulala!” Ghai! Huyo mwanaume alikuwa ananifuck, sema kufuck! Wacha wewe unasema mambo ya kunyonywa, alikuwa ananinyonya namwaga! Sema kumwaga! Ha! Mpaka umenifanya nikuwe horny Ghai! Sasa nitatoa mti wapi?    
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Her shoes were killing her. But Loboutins were worth the death of your heel. The walk to the bed was a slow sashay of the hips, as if performing to a silent orchestra. She loosened the belt of her knee-length trench-coat, then let it drop to the floor with one shrug of her supple shoulders. Standing there, nude, statuesque, she could feel his eyes, like hot coals, boring into her back. She smiled to herself. She knew his eyes paid special attention to her plump butt-cheeks. Her ass was like two huge scoops of ice-cream, so perfectly round and creamy he could only imagine what they’d taste like on his tongue. The contour from her hip, to her thighs, those thick and succulent thighs, was at the moment threatening to send him over the rails. He maintained his cool and walked towards her, his dick hard, pulsating in his boxers, eager to taste the morsel that stood before it. afrhmm He grabbed her shoulders from behind, pulling her closer to his chest. She was enveloped in his muscular arms, aching to lose herself in his embrace. She spun round on her heel to face her Adonis. He was beautiful, she thought to herself. She couldn’t wait to cup that handsome face with her thighs and let him taste her already dripping centre. With his left hand, he pulled her close by the waist, and with his right he lifted her chin up closer to his mouth. When their lips met, the velvet touch of his tongue sent soft tremors through her body, straight down to her moist pussy. He leaned into her, making her backtrack, falling down down down until the obstacle that was the bed, hindered any more movement. She didn’t stay down for long and sat up as soon as her back hit the covers. His wry smile, beckoned her to unbuckle his belt and pull down his denim pants. His dick jutted out, as soon as his boxers were removed. It pointed at her. She tried to hide her astonishment but her face was awash with excitement. It wasn’t threateningly huge, but it was big. She looked up at him and smiled. With her eyes still fixed upon his, she opened her mouth, and took him in. Suckling justย  the knob at first, before engulfing him whole, until he felt the back of her throat wrapped gently around the head of his dick. She did this all the while suckling his shaft with her soft tongue. She could see his eyes glaze over with ecstasy with every bobbling motion her head made. He knew he couldn’t hold back much longer, he was about to explode into her mouth. He pulled out, just as the sensations threatened to overwhelm him. Gently holding her head, he laid her down and parted her thighs, kneeling so that his lips were at a level with her most carnal centre, the musk of her wet pussy wafting into his nostrils. He went dizzy with desire. He licked her outer lips, and worked his way in. Lapping up her wetness, spreading it over her engorged lips. He pinched the hood, covering her clit, making the fabled little knob come into the light, out ofย  hiding. He licked it once, she trembled. He smiled. He suckled her nubbin, in-between tongue kissing the inside of her pussy. It didn’t take long before she started to grind her hips to meet his warm mouth. She could feel the tidal wave, edging closer and closer. The shivers went all the way to her slender toes. Her breathe hastened, she was now heaving. He concentrated his attentions, exclusively on her knob. She reached down to his head and held it. Not so much for direction, but as a handle for what was coming next. Her guttural moan and the way her lithe form was shaking, let him know that he had sent her over the edge and into oblivion. All flush and disoriented, she let out a small laugh. She pulled him on to the bed, turned him onto his back and straddled his thick staff. He glided right in, aided by her creamy pulsating lips, still quivering and twitching from her recent orgasm. She leaned down to kiss him and tasted herself on his lips. He thrust his hips up and down to meet her ass riding him ever so gently. She started to suck his dick in using her pussy. Kegels, a girls best friend. It had the desired effect. It felt like she was giving him a blowjob with her vaginal walls. Her held onto her hips and drove deeper into her. afrer She cried out, he was on her G-spot. She could feel it coming over her again, he was big and his head touched her right there! He continued to pummel away at her, hitting that sweet spot over and over again. Tears welled up in her eyes, she was cumming. She could see it in his eyes, he was cumming too. She dug her fingers into his shoulders, as he dug his into the flesh of her ass. They rode the wave together, his cum dripping onto his balls and onto the bed. Looking into each others eyes, they descended the heights of ecstasy together. She giggled, the giggle of a high-school girl who just been wooed out of her panties by Prince Charming for her first time. He smiled at her and kissed her forehead. “Cut!!! Hio ni poa sana! Take five Maureen. Nyash, ume fuck huyo dem vipoa sana. Tutarudi ku film scene ya pili after the break.” The director motioned to his crew to take aย  break. Maureen took the towel hanging over the director’s seat and wiped off Nyash’s sperm and her sweat. It was her first day on set. She hoped to be the next big thing, on the Kenyan porn industry. It was daunting, but at least she got to wear Loboutins.
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images_6 1:50 pm. I walk in. You’re seated at the head of the long table reading through some papers, forehead creased in concentration. You’re nervous. Your big meeting is set to start in 10 minutes. I’m horny. I don’t care. A few steps and I’m right next to you. You open your mouth to talk but I don’t let you get a word in. I bend down and plant my lips right on top of yours tongue darting in to stifle any errant sounds you might think to produce. You stand up from your chair hoping to push me away, our lips are still conjoined and I’m not about to let you go. I wiggle my butt onto the boardroom table as I wrap my arms around your neck and my legs around your hips. A poke on your ass with my heels brings you closer so that your hardening manhood is grinding onto my extremely sensitive pussy lips. I frigged my cunt good before I showed up at your office, hot and ready. I pull my lips away from yours to whisper in your ear, “If you don’t get your trousers out of the way you’re going to have to explain away the extremely embarrassing wet spot I’ll leave behind, to your board.” A little fiddling and your rock hard member is free. I try to pull you inside me but you’ve got other ideas. In an unprecedented feat of strength, you extricate me from your body and turn me around. I’m now bent over. One hand holds me down so that my face is on the table, the other reaches under my impossibly short skirt to find no panties to pull aside. Pleasantly surprised, you enter me fully in one swift motion. I moan long and hard. “Silence!” You order. And so begins the dance. In and out. Short hard thrusts alternating with long languid ones. I lift my right leg and grind my ass into your groin, round and round as I squeeze my pussy around your cock. You groan and it’s my turn to whisper, “Silence.” It doesn’t take long and the pressure builds. I look at the clock! Shit a minute to 2. They’ll find us. I explode at that thought and my contractions carry you along with me on my journey to nirvana. A pull here, a tug there, a wet wipe through my swollen, thoroughly satisfied lower lips and a kiss on your cheek. I walk out just as the first one walks in.
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Sometimes all we need a little nasty TLC. You’re home from work/school (not high school), tired, you’ve been rained on, all you want is a hug and some warm tea, but your ‘bae’ ‘boo’ ‘love’ ‘hun’…your resident idiot, is super duper horny for you. You look at that sexy body laid in all its naked glory before you and feel nothing but dread. Your partner wants…nay needs, you to be stellar tonight. There’s nothing worse than sexually disappointing someone so horny they’re turned on by the mere presence of you. No, you need to be at peak performance. But all you wanted is tea! Fuck! How do we salvage this situation? Well, there’s a way you can get the warmth and intimacy you desperately need from your decidedly randy sex mate without leaving them woefully unsatisfied and you even more stressed out and exhausted. The following move is perfect for those nights when all you need is a warm body intent on loving out all the cold this, ironically, chill deficient world, has cruelly inflicted upon you. The Classic Missionary Even monkeys know how to get into this position, but I insist on telling you how because describing these things turns me on a lot little! Lay her down gently on the bed/couch/carpet and kiss her. Kiss her until she starts to moan. afrisex4 Rub yourself against her, body to body, while your tongues whirl against each other’s. If your foreplay involved lots of massage oil then the rubbing will make the experience 100x more erotic. When she’s good and wet, slide your dick head into her. Just the dick head. It’s to collect moisture for what’s coming next. Get your boner wet and slippery then withdraw and run the tip lightly over her swollen clitoris. Some girls will find direct contact to be too much so a circular motion just around the little button’s edges – with a little more pressure than you would around her clit, should do the trick. How to know you’re doing the right thing: She moans, long and hard. Yeah? No. What you should look for is a change in breathing patterns. A sharp intake of breath or an increase in her breathing pace. The faster she breathes the better you’re doing. Of course moaning isn’t discounted…but we’re mostly liars and could be faking it. Just go with the breathing. After rubbing around/on her clit for 15 seconds your dick head is getting dry. Go back down and collect the moisture. Just the dick head yo, don’t get greedy. You can penetrate and withdraw the head a few times just to annoy her, then back to the clit. Take that button in circles until her eyes are rolling in rhythm with your D. Make her beg. Only when she’s at peak arousal are you allowed to enter her full. Do it slowly and gently. Love that pussy. Take it. Have it. Like it’s your most precious possession. As you enter her try your best to maintain eye contact. This part will require a little dialogue beforehand but it’s worth it. Keeping your eyes locked together throughout will be hard. The sensations coursing through your body at this point if you’ve followed my instructions, will be forcing your eyes shut like you’ve got magnets on each eyelid. Ignore instinct and watch your partner make love to you. Intimacy is the key word and this is a foolproof way to achieve it. Who cums first? It’s quite hard to achieve a simultaneous orgasm but trying is always a lot of fun! Having a generous partner that tries to make sure you cum first is always a major plus. Gents have famously been castigated for their selfish ways and we forget that us girls need to make his cumming interesting too. Do your best during foreplay to turn him on as much as you possibly can. Get better at head. Reciprocate with the massage. Don’t be afraid to feel around for sensitive spots. Use all these to your advantage. Move around during the missionary. This isn’t the position to leave it all up to him. Man in charge mpaka lini? You canย shouldย will take control and make his blood boil? What are all those late nights, spent winding your waist in time with Konshens’ instructions for if you can’t transfer this particular skill set to your bedroom? Any ‘good girls’ reading this? You don’t go out? Well, almost all the nursery rhymes we learned as kids taught us how to wind the waist. Yes, it was all for practice. Hook those legs around his waist and start moving! Kegels mami. Super important. That dick massage from your pussy will have him singing the Opera…in his mother tongue!!! Who said the missionary was boring. I would personally like to thank Johann Ludwig Kraphf (sp?) and his Mrs for bringing this position back and insisting on it as the Standard for all good Christians everywhere. In no way did they mention not fiddling with it. Be innovative. Make the tried and true a little nastier. afro
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I think it’s time we dropped this charade. It’s getting older than Moi’s nose hairs and it may earn us men some much needed respite. We have been accused, we have plead not guilty on numerous accounts but have been convicted none the less, even when the charges belonged to the next man. I’d like to throw myself at the mercy of the court when I admit that, all men are dogs. Yes. All of us. Filthy, horny, dogs. We couldn’t keep it in our pants even if it meant World Peace (which it probably does :-/). From your Dad to that silent guy who is always hunched over his computer at work (someone should look into that guy, I think he’s watching porn). We are dogs. Come on ladies, the writing was on the wall, we even gave you a little hint. A dog is man’s best friend. Who said, “Show me your friends and I’ll tell you who you are”? He was talking about man and his doggy mate. Why choose to be a dog? You may ask, well, it’s because we can. Simple. There’s not a more selfish, insensitive and callous animal than the male of the human species. We were not created with a caring bone in our bodies. Caring was just implied in the Creator of the Universe manual. Females on the other hand are blessed with being able to bring forth life, hence are natural care-givers. Save us the guilt trip, those are the sort of characteristics necessary for us to be hunters and conquerors, so that the family could eat and we could have dominion over nature, just as the good Lord intended. If we cared about monogamy and the sanctity of life and all of that ethical crap, the human species would have died out ages ago. This also comes with some baggage, as most men, by default, don’t give a shit about female emotions. Only what they harbor in between their thighs. It’s all a game of who can pierce the most pussies in a single lifetime. A game most men are more than willing to take part in. Other men are less than enthusiastic about our hunger games, because society decided to create morals. Now its frowned upon if I shag 10 girls while having someone at home. I forgot to tell them about her! You try declaring your marital status to her while she’s all wrapped up around you, moving under you, when you’re completely taken by thick thighs with tears in your eyes (this shit even rhymes, that’s how right it is!) That girl will turn into a raging bull so fast!!! If you manage to hold on and keep your dick inside her during the bucking, it’ll be the fuck of your life!!! Better be worth it though, because she will find your wife. Divorce, ostracism, half your wealth gone… Woe unto you if you get caught cleaning the maid’s pipes! Hitler never died people, he just lived on in form of this nonsense. Now, since I feel for all you dogs out there, I did some research and some baking and found a way for you to have your cake and eat it too. Want to be a dog and still keep the wifey around? ‘;o Well, beat her with the same stick she beats you with. I mean fuck her into submission. Yes, there’s such a thing. This theory brings a whole new meaning to the phrase “fuck her brains out”. Scientists contend that an extraordinarily intense orgasm can cause temporary memory loss. Anything that powerful can always come to your aid because even if the memory loss is temporary, the effects are permanent. How many women have you ever heard confess that they want to leave their philandering men but can’t because, and I quote, “The D is too damn good”? It’s what shackles them to the relationship. When they say good D, they mean toes curling, blindness causing, failure of motor functions inducing, mother’s maiden name calling good D. The type she has to ask which year it is afterwards. The type that leaves her muttering nothingness into the pillowcase, twitching. Never underestimate the power of good Dick. Since you’re in trouble for doing the same to other innocent victims, you might as well pick up the experience from your away games to please the home crowd. I won’t stand here and preach that this is the miracle cheat for all you horny bastards, but it’s damn sure going to create some breathing space for you. You just need her to have a reason to hold on to your sorry ass. Plus treat her like a queen. Even if she thinks you’re cheating, the ethereal sex and a dozen of roses you sent to her mother, will confuse the fuck out of her. And even before the jury reaches a verdict of whether or not you’re guilty in the matter of the state vs your libido, their minds have already been swayed by how many times you made them all cum. And that gentlemen, is how you get away with murder, I rest my case.
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beach Here and now, let me tell you today, NEVER EVER HAVE SEX AT THE BEACH!!! EVER!!! Why? Well, because it’s a really really bad idea for your genitals. So the year is…I can’t remember, and the waves are nice. It’s October, my birthday month and because it’s the beginning of my personal new year, I’m feeling optimistic as fuck!!! I need adventure and I need it now! What’s perfect for a Coastal girl like me? Well, beach sex of course! I’d lived in Mombasa almost all my life and certainly all my sex life and I had never gotten a chance to coit in the sand and salt. I’m not stupid and I listen to the sexual elders that came before me so I knew to avoid the sand as much as I possibly could. No romantic romps lying missionary on a picnic rug on the white glittery sands for me. I’m not a big fan of impromptu FGM via friction or the inevitable bacterial infections that would accompany such folly. I had, had a quickie by the beach once, with Johnny (*sigh*) of the 96 fucks, but that didn’t count because I was bent over from a standing position with my jeans and mother’s unions pulled down over my ass. We were hiding behind the perimeter wall of one of those Muhindi beach houses, it was dirty and sexy. Not romantic, salty and involving lost swimming bottoms…this is what I craved. Johnny’s almost, didn’t count. My October madness considered, I was mad. Crazy for some under water drilling. My old flame was back in the country from educational forays abroad and our first time on Kenyan soil was going to be in the Indian Ocean. Determination was me. He was scared of the choppy waters at first. It was a long time since he’d swam, and since the days of slavery, Africans are notoriously afraid of salty water (Dothraki references anyone?). After my best attempts at acting sexy and failing miserably at it, he followed me in (pity no doubt) We braved the waves that occasionally got the better of us. After swallowing a tonne of whale semen, the sexy bit begun. We were picking seaweed off each other when the tides literally turned. It got sexy so fast! I don’t know how else to explain it but I totally got wet, under water. I was so slippery it was hard to keep steady and told him that I needed to hold onto him to avoid drowning (really smooth, I know). He complied and I wrapped myself around him. His hands roamed and he found my tits, they were set off deliciously in my skimpy swim suit and I could feel the effect I had on him. At that moment I wished I’d taken him straight to bed so that I could explore that massive monster in his trunks intimately. He started playing with my clit but the salty water found its way under the hood. Kumbe that button is sensitive in more ways than one! Weh! I slapped his hands right off! THE PAIN!!!! I’m a determined, horny, little (not-so-little) fucker though, so I was going to finish what I’d started. Besides, anyone that gets a guy hard in such cold water had better finish what she started. Sio rahisi bana! He entered me and it felt soooo good. In and out I bobbed, the water covering me fully at times. I almost drowned trying to keep the movements going. Plus dick that good had me closing my eyes and I couldn’t look out for those killer waves. I kept going though. Because a Kamba girl is nothing if not dedicated. I’ve heard is said (by me) that “Joto ya wasichana wakamba ndio ilimaliza maji Ukambani”. #factsonly Apparently my pussy was just as good (if not better) as his dick and the man also closed his eyes. Sema wave kutulemea! At that very moment the biggest wave ever hit us and we were suddenly 4 feet under water. His dick stuck in me, my massive thighs wrapped around him, we sunk! Deep! I don’t know by what miracle we resurfaced I tell you, because believe it or not, even after about a few minutes fighting the water above us, we never separated. We breathed that air as one, massive dick still moving in and out of me, like our genitals didn’t even need air to go on. They were like “Y’all just do what you gotta do, we live and die fucking.” Apana, hapo I just said no! I cannot die like this! What would they tell my mother when they found my body floating in the Indian Ocean with that thing (probably still hard) inside me? I told him it was over. Thank you but this adventure was over. I was wrong! I hadn’t ever had anyone that large inside me and my body wasn’t used to providing the necessary amounts of juice to lube me up. The guy had rubbed me raw on the inside and the second he withdrew all the way, a rush of salty water rushed in to replace him! Guys, I’ve felt labour and that pain was nothing!!!! My pussy literally screamed in agony! I got to the shore and begged him to cover me with the leso I’d brought to wipe with as I washed my pussy with the fresh water he’d carried for drinking. People were watching but after a lot of consideration and my cookie hurling insults my way for subjecting her to such dire straits, I gave in, squatted and rinsed. It almost felt like an orgasm. My lips were so hot and swollen! And red!!! Never again I tell you! Never ever! Beach sex on my honeymoon? No, not me! My boo wasn’t spared though, the salt water had gotten into his small hole but because I finished all the water washing my poor pussy, he had to semi limp all the way home. I didn’t give up on adventure though, as I said before, I’m too horny to dwell on sexual mishaps.  
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